Beware the "choking game"

A friend of mine noted with concern a growing phenomenon among kids age 9-16.  It is called the "choking game."  Parents and youth workers should be aware and on guard. For more information check out the links below.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Choking_game
http://chokinggame.net
http://www.stop-the-choking-game.com/en/home.html
http://www.telecomassociation.com/pubs/chokinggamereport/index.htm

 

Including young adults in the church

I'm often asked, Why don't we see more young adults in church?

The answer is complex and includes understanding the huge cultural shifts ocurring in our world - from modernity to postmodernity; from a culture that is predominantly Christian to one that is predominantly post-Christian. Along with these shifts has come the exit of many young adults from active participation in the church.

What are we to do?  There is no simple answer.  But in my experience (including long discussions with young adults), there are recurring themes that suggest helpful steps.  

I recently read the book, "Tribal Church, Ministering to the Missing Generation" by Carol Howard Merritt, a young female church pastor.  Her book offers helpful ideas. While I don't agree with all of them, I think she understands the issues well and has found meaningful solutions - all having primarily to do with embracing young adults and including them in the life of churches that intentionally have become more cross-generational. Here are selected quotes:

We need to yearn for intergenerational connection [and diversity]... As John Austin says, "The healthiest islands are biodiverse."  In our increasingly segregated culture, older generations, young families, and single people can learn to listen and care for each other.... Congregations can increase intergenerational hospitality through visible signs so growth can flourish and we can expand our biodiversity...[where] the old, the young, and everyone in between [is] seen and heard (pp. 20-22).  

Merritt goes on to point out ways that churches inadvertently erect barriers to young adult participation:

• Setting schedules and programs in ways that say to young people and young families, "not welcome here." 
  
• Decorating the church in ways that are unattractive to younger people
• Treating young people as a "target audience" rather than as individual people with unique needs, who happen to be young.
• Not providing child care for young families (our church functions often do not provide for children, leaving mothers out as well).
• Not understanding the exceptional demands placed on the time and budgets of young people (young adults find themselves struggling in an enormous economic crisis not of their own making).
• Not understanding the level of support young adults need, but usually hesitate to seek out.
• Making our congregations bastions of conservative political viewpoints not shared by many young believers.  Do we send the message that political progressives (of any age group) are unwelcome?
• Related to the issue above, expressing an level of intolerance that is hard for a post-modern to stomach (and a level that seems quite uncharacteristic of Jesus).
• Not acknowledging a variety of valid expressions of Christian spirituality - insisting on doing things, "the way we've always done it." Vital congregations learn to adapt their customs while keeping their traditions.
• An unwillingness to share leadership with young adults (is there a young adult on your advisory council? On your ministry leadership team?).
• Putting all the focus on the mind (being cerebrally focused) rather than embracing all of the senses in worship and teaching. Young adults, typically post-modern in their mind-set and preferences, tend to seek image-rich environments that involve all the senses.
• Not addressing in our teaching and preaching the life issues that young people actually have to deal with. The issue here is one of relevance and respect.
• Not using the resources of the church to provide places and spaces where young adults can build relationships with their peers and with other generations.

There are no "magic methods" for removing these barriers. And we must avoid trying to merely program our way through them - these issues are fundamentally relational. What young adults want, is what Jesus has created us all to need - cross-generational community - "places and spaces" where people of all generations are welcomed, appreciated, blessed and incorporated - communities of faith that live out of the life and love of God that is shared with us in our union with Jesus. Such places embrace young adults, along with people of all ages - helping all people experience true communion with God and his people.